Overachievement gap

Even before I read Judy Caprez' last article on "children's own responsibility for choosing their own careers," I've often wondered about the concept of overachievement. In Caprez' mind, at least some of the time what she denotes (loosely) as overachievement can be equated with social, if not psychological, pathology. If children come from broken homes (as I did) and they aspire beyond their apparent intellectual means in high school (as I did) they are in danger of overachieving. (I guess I did.)

But the facts are, and the dangers are much greater, that children who come out of disturbed family relationships (to a limited extent we all do) will underachieve academically as well as in other ways. (This is the overwhelming problem of black young men in this country.) An obvious rejoinder is that Japanese and Singaporean young peolple are all expected to overachieve academically, and for the most part they do. So do many, if not most, Jewish and Asian kids in this country. (My son doesn't count into this categorization, since he's a "hybrid," and incidentally a proud, died in the wool Hays-tian.)

So this concept of, and concern with, academic overachievement has little to do with actual performance (especially with rampant grade inflation), rather with sometimes unrealistic expectations parents may have for their children. In the U.S., however, there's hardly any danger that a plague of overachievement is about to descend on us. In fact, academic underachievement is our present affliction. (Now when it comes to sports participation and performance, it's another matter entirely.)

Caprez does recognize something which in fewer for instances might seem a cause for alarm. This is that for a few who have obvious limitations to their academic prowess that they may aspire to something beyond their intellectual means. This shouldn't be a cause for great alarm however, since most professionals have demonstrated quite adequately that it can, without great difficulty, be overcome.

About children choosing their own careers: Good idea! But knowledgeable parental guidance (sometimes to rein in unrealistic aspirations or expectations) can be valuable and if tendered in the right spirit accepted (for what it's worth). In keeping with the adage "them that has does" it's best to keep your advice to yourself unless you really know what you're talking about. (This is a practice many who write letters to the editor of this newspaper happily disregard.)

Look, we're trying to get our kids to be their best and do their best. It's not always easy. But we should not be confounding the issues and problems they face with our own biases and prejudices. (When I say to my son that I would do something in a certain way, he's likely to reply, "Yes I know Dad, but that's you, not me." I took this to account duly a while back.)

I want to compliment Judy Caprez for completing this series of articles which have been useful and helpful -- and unusually insightful. I also want to congratulate her on the completion of a noteworthy career. From one ex-western Pennsylvanian to another, well done Judy!

Gary J. Whitesell

213 W. 21st